By Joel Magalnick, JTNews Correspondent
For centuries, families have passed the honor of rabbi through their generations, from father to son.
In recent years, daughters have begun to have the rabbinical mantle passed from their fathers, signaling a new way of doing things. Now, however, a new tradition has begun, as a mother who is also a rabbi watches over the ordination of her son.
Among the first to experience this new life passage is the Schuster family here in the Seattle area.
Rabbi Neal Schuster, 33, received his ordination in May from Hebrew Union College, the rabbinical institution of the Reform movement. He joins his mother, Arlene, who received her ordination from the Aleph Organization for Jewish Renewal just six years before.
While the two share a title, both rabbis say Neal didn’t choose to become a rabbi because his mother did.
“Anyone who knows Neal would certainly not say Neal’s following in his mother’s footsteps. Neal doesn’t follow in anyone’s footsteps.” Arlene says.
Neal echoes that sentiment, but notes that both mother’s and son’s reasons for entering the rabbinate came from the same place.
“The influences that led to her decision to become a rabbi were the same influences that made my decision,” he says. “Judaism permeated everything we did, and all of our lives.” That included feeding the pets before his family ate dinner, Neal says, because the Torah commands that animals which provide for the family should have the honor of eating first.
Judaism also permeated their lives in the community. Neal and his brothers — he’s the youngest of five — are fifth-generation Seattleites. Though their father Joseph Schuster moved here when he was younger, Arlene — who comes from the Mosler family — says four of those five generations included presidents of their respective synagogues. The last in that line, so far, anyway, is Neal’s older brother Brian, who was president of Temple B’nai Torah. In addition, four members of the family, including Neal’s wife Tamara, are currently Jewish educators.
At least for now, however, that Seattle dynasty will have to be carried on by the other Schusters. Neal recently accepted a pulpit position at Temple B’nai Jehudah in Overland Park, Kan., a suburb of Kansas City.
The movers packed up his belongings last week. Now Neal, Tamara, and their two children Elana, 2, and Ayelet, who just turned a year old, are excited to start this new chapter in their lives.
“I think it’s going to be a great opportunity for us,” Neal says. “Kansas City felt like the right match from the very beginning.”
While Neal says the mother-son aspect of his new rabbi status is a bonus, he has been too busy lately to think about it. Yet he and Arlene acknowledge the uniqueness of their position.
“We’re one of the very few, if there are any others,” Arlene says, but “that will change over the years.”
“As one of my colleague said recently, we grew up in an age where there were always women rabbis,” Neal adds. “We’re just used to it.”
The idea of female rabbis is a new phenomenon in and of itself. The Reform movement ordained its first woman rabbi 31 years ago, and the Conservative movement followed suit in 1986. Jewish Renewal began ordaining rabbis, both male and female, in the 1970s.
One thing Neal’s rabbinical experience has done is change the nature of the relationship with his mother.
“Neal and I are definitely colleagues,” Arlene says. “We rely on each other. He asks my advice, I ask his.” Yet their professional relationship doesn’t stop her from gushing, like a mother should.
“I’m very, very pleased for Neal. I think he’s going to make an outstanding rabbi,” she adds. “He’s passionate about his Jewish identity…. He’s very, very good with people.”
Rabbi David Fine, the director of the Union of American Hebrew Congregations’ Pacific Northwest office, echoed Arlene’s comments. When Neal asked Rabbi Fine to be his sponsor at the ordination, the rabbi said he was honored. It was “a wonderful recognition for him as a new rabbi,” said Rabbi Fine. “It was a ritual done well.”
The two met in the 1980s, when Rabbi Fine was principal of the Hebrew High School. They had been in touch throughout Neal’s formal Jewish education.
Neal hadn’t always planned to pursue the rabbinate, however. After graduating from college, he worked in a business with one of his brothers, spent some time in Israel, and did Jewish communal work. People would constantly ask him when he was going to become a rabbi, Neal says. At one point, he felt the need to reassess his direction in life. “Having been in real estate, I ran the numbers,” he says. “Every time I ran the numbers, it came up rabbi.”
His wife Tamara had a part in that decision as well. She attended HUC as well, in the Jewish Education Studies program. She graduated before the two were married, and Neal began his rabbinical education.
So what about coming home? Arlene says she would love to have Neal nearby, but the family stays close no matter the distance. “We work very hard as a family to stay connected,” she says. “It’s his life, he needs to do what he needs to do.”
Though they are just arriving in Kansas, Neal says he wouldn’t mind coming back to the Pacific Northwest.
“We miss Seattle, we miss the community, a lot of our friends. It would be a wonderful place” to return to. But, he adds, “the future is a long road.”